Weekend Enshrouded in Plagues and Fog

“During my at-bat, I had them in my nose,” he said. “I chased a foul ball after that and I ate about four of them on my way down. It was very strange. Joba had them all over his back and all over his neck and all over everywhere.”
-New York Yankees' Doug Mientkiewicz, commenting on the 8th inning nightmare bug infestation in Cleveland, Ohio during Game 2, AL Playoffs, October 5, 2007, from today's New York Times.

First, it was leaving my dog behind on the elevator Friday morning. Then last evening, on the south shore of Lake Erie, a plague of Canadian soldiers swarmed my beloved New York Yankees. Finally, this morning I woke up in a city enshrouded in fog and with temperatures unseasonably warm for this time of year. Portents of disaster.

WOTBA promises to fight through all the fogs to bring you exciting reportage from NYC this weekend. While other metropolitan websites take time off on the weekend to indulge in 48 hours of brunch, WOTBA cranks up the volume.

Image: Bust of Sylvette, Pablo Picasso. Courtyard of Silver Towers (I.M. Pei, architect). Between Bleecker and Houston. Morning of October 6, 2007.

TYRONE
We're in for another night of fog, I'm afraid.

MARY
Oh, well, I won't mind it tonight.

TYRONE
No, I don't imagine you will, Mary.

-from Long Day's Journey Journey Into Night, a play by Eugene O'Neill

New York Yankees Post-season Diet Challenge

I love the New York Yankees, especially Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter, so I'm excited about the prospects for the post-season. The Yankees are the main reason I visit the Bronx.

I've devised a post-season diet challenge for Yankees fans, especially for those who would like to lose a little weight. Though I imagine all of you to be thin, a few of you may want to lighten up before the holidays.

Here's how it works: Select the number of the player's jersey that matches the number of pounds you would like to lose. See the active roster here. Now imagine that the player whose number you've located is your diet buddy. For example, if you think you need to lose 13 pounds then Alex Rodriguez could be your diet buddy! If you're a zoftig individual, then maybe you'll need to buddy up with Joba Chamberlain (62!) Or if you just want to lose a couple of pounds, then Derek Jeter (2) is your guy. Lucky you!

The fun part is that once you start to lose weight, by walking of course, then you can trade down. For example, if you start out with 18 as your goal (Johnny Damon) and then you lose 7 pounds, then Doug Mientkiewicz (11) can be your new best friend.

Now you know how to play the game. Good luck!

I read somewhere online the other day that Mickey Mantle would sometimes walk from his place on the east side to Yankee Stadium. I can't find it now. Imagine my pitiful condition typing in the word "walk" in a baseball-related search, and you get the picture.

A Diet Should Last as Long As The Major League Baseball Season

As I indicated by my previous post on Alex Rodriguez, I enjoy baseball and the New York Yankees in particular. Because I want to lose weight at a reasonable pace and keep it off, I have decided to steer clear of any annoying quick weight loss plan. In addition I do not personally care for any diet that tells me that I can't eat anything fun for the first two weeks.
Therefore, I am happy to lose at the rate of 1 to 2 pounds a week, the pace I'm on now. I figure this should take me through the World Series in October.
And after that, I may have more to lose. I'll need to maintain the weight by walking and watching what I eat. New York in the fall and winter, after all, is a big weight trap.

BREAKING NEWS: Alex Hits 500

Alex hit his 500th with an upper deck shot! I take pleasure knowing that I must have encouraged him with my previous post.

Me and Alex Rodriguez are Exactly Alike

When I stepped on the scale this morning and sadly realized that I hadn't lost much weight this week, my thoughts naturally turned to New York Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez.

For the past week or so, Alex, who has been trying over and over to hit his 500th major league home run, steps up to the plate and faces thousands of flashing cameras and hundreds of winsome child-made "Hit It Here" signs. The children's parents have just shelled out $8 for a small beer. Alex looks cool, sometimes blowing pink chewing gum bubbles and shaking the crick out of his neck. The batter before him just hit a home run, and the one after him will hit one also. He has pretty eyes.

What is wrong with Alex? Is he preoccupied with José Conseco's confessional literary career? Did he find that the new mansion he is rumored to be purchasing in the suburbs too large to vacuum?

Never fear, Alex. As long as you work hard and focus on the speeding baseball, you will hit your home run. And I will lose another couple of pounds. One day doesn't matter. It's about the long run.

In most other respects, I think that Alex Rodriguez and I are more different than alike.

End of July Progress Report: 2nd base

I began this walking routine in late May at the time of my birthday. I spent my birthday at Yankee Stadium, drinking beer and eating hot dogs and watching the Yankees lose to the Angels. It was a great time even though my team lost. Later that weekend my spouse noted that our bathroom scale was broken, so I went to the store and bought a new one. The next morning I weighed myself. I was too fat. The day after that, around May 30, I started walking around New York, sketchbook in hand, and watching what I ate.
I have since discovered great treasures in the city. And I have lost 17.5 pounds in 9 weeks. I'm half way home.
The Yankees are doing much better now also, thank you very much.